Established

Life fell apart

People walked away

Doors closed

Change was rampant

Just wanted something to be concrete

To be stable

But still

Things were uncertain

Everything was a question mark

But

When left in the Father's hands

Peace abounded

Joy flooded

And it was found

That all along

Things weren't falling apart

They were falling in place

When we surrender our lives to Him. Choose full release. We find that the chaos we felt when everything seemed to be falling apart, was actually Him delicately placing everything in its proper place, at its proper time. One of the hardest parts of surrender for me is releasing the desire to know. To know what's next. To know why. To know how. To know. But, if I knew all the answers, faith wouldn't be necessary. A word that's been on my heart lately is "establish." The reason it's been on my heart is because of Proverbs 16:9, "In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps."

I imagine a strong, functional building with an established foundation. There is no question on if that building will stand. It's established. Or an older man or woman who people refer to as "established." They know their purpose, they've lived so much life, they're rooted, planted. Other words that come to mind are: unwavering, steadfast, clear.

I love how Proverbs 16:9 paints this picture. So often, we plan our lives out, our seasons out. But God sees the bigger picture and He established every step. He makes clear where He wants our feet to land. There is no unsteady step when we establish ourselves in Him and His Word. There have been many times in my life where I've felt like I was taking a step in the dark. Hoping I landed it, hoping I didn't miss it, or step on anything wrong. But, when I release that fear, and trust Him to be my Shepherd. He illuminates the path and guides my foot every step of the way. I praise God that in moments where my desires didn't align with His will, He provided me with everything I needed and tore down the desires that would've led to my destruction. Praise. God. Often times, in the moments of our desires breaking, we cry out to God in desperation for Him to put it back together. What we often miss is the fact that the breaking of our desires saved us from breaking. That when we surrender to Him and we trust that He will establish our steps, we recognize, He takes note of our desires, but prioritizes our needs. So if our desires will nullify and negatively affect our needs, He will protect us from ourselves. Our desires might not be bad things, we might desire good things, but they may not be God things. They may not be what He sees for us. When it comes to our desires, He will destroy them if they go against His way and Word. He will refine them to realign them. Or He will provide them, all in His timing. We only see each step, but He sees the whole picture. We live in a culture that is obsessed with instant gratification. This bleeds into how we act with our desires. We want them instantly, without taking a breath and considering the consequences. Without considering listening to Him, His Word, and trusted voices first. We need to remove the road block of instant gratification and realize that is often not how God works. He works in processes, journeys, and paces. He is less concerned about getting you to what you want/need, and most concerned with how you get there. We all need the process. It's there we receive refining, growth, and the tension of discomfort. Choose to either live in fear of taking the wrong step, or live in peace knowing the Lord will establish every step. But, in order to have that peace, we must believe His heart is to establish us. And also trust that every desire denied is a step established. Established steps will not always look like open doors, winning, success, or yeses. Established steps will often look like desires broken down, but unknown needs met. Closed doors. Protection. It's when we trust His establishment that we realize that He had us the entire time. Nothing was ever "falling apart" (maybe in our eyes), but in His eyes, everything was in complete control and all the pieces were being intentionally placed. How beautiful. It is a world changing shift when we decide to lean into being established by Him, that is where we trade the chaos of the unknown and shifting of plans, for a peace in the One, Who holds it all.

The process of establishing isn't pretty. Established building, established people all had to go through things that weren't pretty to get them as strong, dependable, and sturdy as they are now.